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The Truth About Living in Panama
Sizing up Panama and Traffic
Zonian
Surfin’ Panama
Why You Should Buy a Beach House in Buenaventura Now
Funny Anecdotes #1 – Asking for Directions in Panama (and People with Hats)

THE TRUTH ABOUT LIVING IN PANAMA

Told by an Italian who has been here for more than 20 years

By K.C.

In this article you will find the following information:

  • General Prices in Panama
  • Utilities
  • Customer Service and Tourism
  • The Truth About Living in Panama, Generally Speaking

GENERAL PRICES IN PANAMA

Is it a fly? Is it a paper plane? No, it’s Panamanian inflation.

When foreigners move here, they think of Panama as seen in online hyperboles from real estate brochures dated 10, 15 or even 20 years ago. Well, times have changed and it shows.

The state in the US with the most expensive milk is Hawaii, where a gallon of milk costs $4.69, according to Zippia.com, “The Career Expert.” Also according to Zippia, the state with the cheapest milk is Illinois, where a gallon of milk costs only $0.93. In the UK, a gallon of milk costs $4.76. While everybody knows that everything is more expensive in a remote cluster of islands in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, or in the UK for that matter, they might not know that a gallon of milk costs $5.39 at PriceSmart, which is a membership warehouse with the cheapest prices for any quality item sold in big quantities to customers in Panama. A regular supermarket sells that same gallon of milk for $6.18. But not everything is expensive in Panama. Keep reading to have an idea of how prices vary according to accessibility.

Before the price of eggs skyrocketed this February, a dozen eggs cost $2 in the US. A disease called highly pathogenic avian influenza, also known as Bird Flu, a disease lethal in birds, “is the cause of this drastic inflation of eggs,” according to economists interviewed by CNBC in March of this year. The disease killed a record number of egg-laying hens in 2022. If anything, come to Panama to have an omelet. The average price of twelve large eggs in Panama is about $2.70. A dozen eggs in Italy cost almost $4 and $4.21 in the US now.

“Buying a car in Panama is similar to buying one in North America, however prices will be about 15% to 20% higher on average,” according to International Relocation Firm.

The price of 1 kg of potatoes in Panama City is $1.95, whereas it is $2.75 in the US, $2.18 in Costa Rica, $2.37 in Canada, $3.28 in Puerto Rico and $3.56 in South Korea, according to Numbeo.com.

The price of 1 kg of white rice in Panama City is $1.78, 40% less expensive than in San Diego, California, and around the same percentage less expensive than Florida, according to data collected from Expatistan. A kilogram of rice in those two states costs around $4.50 and $4.67.

The Consumer Price Index (CPI) registered a variation of 2% in February, 2023, in Panama when compared to the same month of the previous year (year-on-year inflation), a result that is lower than the 2.7% observed twelve months ago, according to the Central American Monetary Council (Consejo Monetario Centroamericano). According to Take-Profit.org: “Inflation Rate in Panama increased by 2.04% in February 2023 over the same month in the previous year.”

Although the inflation in Panama has been consistently stable and even getting lower, it is not low generally speaking.

“A rate of inflation higher than 2% is considered high,” according to Investopedia.

UTILITIES

The price of electricity is $0.18 per kWh for households and $0.19 for businesses in Panama, according to Global Petrol Houses. In the US, the average is 0.12 per kWh. The average price in the world is $0.171 per kWh. Naturgy, a Spanish multinational natural gas and electrical energy utilities company that also operates in Latin America, among many other countries, has been in Panama since 1998.

Also according to Global Petrol Houses, the price of 1.5 liters of bottled water is $1.12 in Panama, whereas the average price for all the 92 countries in their database is $0.71. There are a total of 195 countries in the world, which means that their average is based on 47% of the most developed countries on the planet.

It is not unsafe to drink tap water in Panama, nor uncommon. All the restaurants here serve tap water with plenty of ice and it is still very rare to get sick from it. Consider that a human organism has to adapt to a new environment and it might take from a few weeks to a few months depending on the exposure to new substances and to the severity of the exposure. Drinking tap water in the Panama interior is, for logical reasons, not as safe as in the city. I do recommend drinking bottled water if you are not in PTY (Panama City).

Utility water bills are very cheap in Panama compared to the US. The average water bill in the US is $39.16, with peaks of $77 in California (the highest) and minimums of $18 in Vermont, according to Wisevoter.com. The average water bill in Panama is around $5, which makes sense in a tropical country where it rains a lot. The Panama Canal is dependent on water, which comes from the persistent rain that fills the Gatun Lake. The name “Panama” comes from a Guarani word that means “abundance of fish,” or “place of many fish.”

On their Internet page, the National Authority of Public Services (Autoridad Nacional de los Servicios Públicos, or ASEP) states that they charge an average of $1.50 per 1,000 gallons.

An Internet and Cable plan in Panama costs between $40 and $65.

Panama has 20 different Internet service providers, the most popular being + Movil and Cable Onda. Use either of these two: their customer service and English skills are great.

CUSTOMER SERVICE AND TOURISM

In general, customer service in Panama is wobbly compared to other countries of the region. Don’t be surprised if the receptionist of the hotel on your first night here is not as quick as lighting, but this is changing, as Panamanians are slowly realizing the potential behind tourism (surprisingly enough, tourism is also not exploited as much as in other countries of the region). This could be a positive aspect as much as a negative one. On one hand, Panama offers a plethora of virgin islands and beaches that transport you to a past unlike anything you have ever experienced; on the other, the lack of amenities can make your stay a little less comfortable. The road to San Blas, one of the six comarcas of Panama, is not an easy one, but when you get there (if you do and your car doesn’t get stuck in the mud) the reward is such that it will take your breath away. Note: do not drive to San Blas if it is raining unless your SUV is capable of withstanding high-performance climbs in a muddy terrain.

THE TRUTH ABOUT LIVING IN PANAMA, GENERALLY SPEAKING

Living in Panama is a wonderful and changing experience, especially if you decide to do so by moving to its spectacular beaches. There is no paradise on Earth, but there are places that are close to it.

Please stay tuned for more articles and information, such as price per square meter, which has gone so low since the pandemic that if you want to buy you have to do it right now.

SIZING UP PANAMA AND TRAFFIC

By K.C.

In this article you will find the following information:

  • How Big Is Panama?
  • How Many People Live in Panama?
  • The New Census
  • What’s the Traffic Like in Panama?

HOW BIG IS PANAMA?

Panama measures 75,517 square kilometers or 29,150 square miles. In comparison, the state of Texas is 9.2 times bigger and the country of Spain is 6.7 times bigger. The beauty of Panama lies on the variety of its geography and biodiversity despite being so small. From pristine Caribbean islands on the Atlantic side to white sandy beaches on the Pacific, to lush mountains on the lower-west-side province of Chiriquí, in Panama you have it all within hand’s reach. The longest drive from the capital city to the farthest beach is between eight to nine hours through winding roads (I’m talking from PTY to Bocas del Toro) and believe you me: it is worth it! Thousands of tourists from Canada, the US and Europe flock to this exotic location every year. But even then, a domestic flight from the Marcos A. Gelabert Airport in Albrook to the Bocas del Toro Airport in Isla Colón costs you $134 and will get you there in exactly one hour.

From the city you can reach the beautiful Caribbean islands of San Blas on the Atlantic side in an hour and a half or two by car. Talking about postcard perfect: did you know that the famous desktop picture of a paradisiac island used by Microsoft Windows for many years and seen by billions of people all over the world daily as a background for their monitors is actually a picture of an island in San Blas?

From the capital city to the most all-year-round visited beaches on the Pacific side like Playa Bonita, Punta Chame, Gorgona, La Ensenada, San Carlos, Coronado, Playa Blanca (just to mention a few), it takes a one to two-hour drive.

Panama is the only country in the Americas where you can travel by car from the Pacific side to the Atlantic side in less than two hours. The Volcán Barú, an active stratovolcano and the tallest mountain in Panama, at 3,474 meters (11,398 ft) high, is the 12th highest peak in Central America and the only place in the world where you can see the Atlantic and Pacific Oceans at the same time on a clear day.

HOW MANY PEOPLE LIVE IN PANAMA?

Wikipedia puts it at an estimated 4,337,768 people, which in turn puts the population density of Panama at around 57 persons per square kilometer or 92 persons per square mile, compared to 43 persons per square kilometer or 69 persons per square mile in Texas and 94 persons per square kilometer or 151 persons per square mile in Spain.

So, all in all, Panama as a country has a density of population that is respectable and even appealing. Yet, the capital is a whole different story. The vast concentration of people who live in the Republic of Panama resides in the capital city. An estimated 45% of the people who live in this country mingle in Panama City, according to calculations made by IZTMO BROKERS on data collected from Wikipedia.

According to an estimate by the National Institute of Statistics and Census (Instituto Nacional de Estadística y Censo, or INEC) in 2020, there were 1,206,774 people living in the Panama district, which made the population density of that district at a slightly-above moderate 594 persons per square kilometer, given the fact that the district of Panama comprises 2,031.2 square kilometers of land. So yea, we’re a little tight here, reason why the beach looms so compelling to foreigners who want to move to this beautiful neck of the woods.

“Population density is calculated as the number of persons per unit area. States and Union Territories in which the density of population ranges between 100 and 400 persons per square kilometer are called areas of moderate density of population” says Toppr.com.

So don’t get alarmed: New York City has a density of population of 29,000 people per square kilometer and Santiago de Chile of 9,821 per square kilometer. São Paulo has 7,216.3 residents per square kilometer and Mexico City 6,163.3 per square kilometer. If you really need to know, Dhaka (Bangladesh) led the ranking of cities with the highest population density in 2022, with 30,093 residents per square kilometer. Source: World Population Review and Statista.

THE NEW CENSUS

INEC just wrapped up a brand-new census, which started in January 2023.

“Preliminary results of the new census will be available in June or July of this year and final results by the end of the year or by January of 2024,” a representative of INEC told IZTMO BROKERS today. “Primero Dios.”

Get used to Primero Dios. It means God wiling and they use it a lot. It’s heartening to know that most people here believe in God. Panama uses the dollar since 1904. I was obviously not around when the Balboa, the Panamanian currency that lasted only a week, was created that year, but I picture Primero Dios instead of In God We Trust somewhere in there.

La Estrella de Panama, the oldest newspaper in Panama, came up with an article last month stating that “[INEC] confirmed that census takers visited 1,537,183 homes and took a census of 4 million Panamanians, which represents 90% of the estimated population.”

Although these are only estimates, Panama’s current population by INEC’s assessment today is four and a half million people. 

Foreigners make 5.4%, according to INEC, Colombians being the predominant immigrants (1.6 of every 100 persons in Panama is Colombian, or 64.225 individuals), followed by Venezuelans, (1.4%, or 58.158 individuals) and Nicaraguans (0.70%, or 28.112). Keep in mind that these are preliminary numbers based on 90% of censused people.

There are an estimated 25,000 Americans living in Panama, according to Bright!Tax and an estimated 8,000 Canadians, according to Global Affairs Canada.

2.23% of Panamanians are unalphabetized, 1% doesn’t have either a computer or an Internet access and 7% doesn’t have access to running water and electricity.

WHAT’S THE TRAFFIC LIKE IN PANAMA?

IZTMO BROKERS attempted to reach the Transit and Land Transportation Authority (Autoridad del Tránsito y Transporte Terrestre, or ATTT) with no avail, which is as surprising as snow in Alaska. The latest data about registered vehicles in Panama that is available online that I could find dates back to 2016, when ATTT confirmed a total of 1,221,999 in the entire country, of which 925,143, or 75.7%, in the capital alone. Considering how worse has traffic gotten and how much the population has grown, it wouldn’t be surprising to see much higher numbers today. Stay tuned for more thorough info on: public transportation in Panama, how to avoid getting tickets, how to pay them, how to get the license in the first place and so on. If you know you are going to drive in the city, prepare to be patient.

Traffic is chaotic in all the metropolis of the world and Panama City is no exception. This is why Elon Musk wants to build underground roads with his Boring Company wherever he goes. Before that could ever happen in Panama, they would have to fix the current roads first. Let’s put it this way: if Panama will ever have underground roads like those that Elon Musk is building in the US, I’d rather take a flying car.

How does traffic look in Panama? Like a painting by a man with Parkinson’s disease: messy and unnerving ―something that doesn’t really make any sense or that shouldn’t have happened in the first place. For a reason only known to them, ATTT authorities made sure to add this motto on the cover of the official driving manual of Panama: “Maneje a la defensiva,” which means, drive defensively. 99% of drivers in Panama are aggressive, which is a sign that they don’t really pay attention to what they read, or maybe it just means that everyone is out for themselves. They use turning lights like Christmas lights: once a year and if they still work. Street signs are there for decorative purposes. Yield signs are an attempt to undermine one’s masculinity and dignity. In Panama, the law on the road is: the smaller vehicle has to yield, no matter where is going or what direction is coming from.

But don’t take my word for it. Come and visit this country remembering one thing: every place has its own pros and cons. If I had to start a list of the pros versus all the cons of living in Panama, the former would be much, much longer.

Please come back for more informative articles and remember: Panama is fun.

ZONIAN

By H.W.

In this article, you will find the following information:

  • What is a Zonian
  • What Zonians should expect to find upon moving to Panama

I often consider myself one of the last, if not the last, true Zonians.  The Canal Zone ceased to exist on October 1, 1979 and I came along a few weeks later.  I call it a technicality, but still consider myself a Zonian.  It’s a badge of pride for many, myself included.  You might be asking yourself, what is a Zonian?  The answer is simple, anyone born within the Panama Canal Zone, between August 1, 1914 and October 1, 1979.  The treaties signed between Panama and the United States took effect on that day and the Panama Canal Zone was gradually handed over to Panama.  Sadly yet expectedly, many Zonians were not happy about this.  They felt their home had been ripped away from them, by forces beyond their control.

But I’m not here to talk about whether or not they are justified in their anger.  Rather, I want to talk about the present.  Over the past couple decades, some Zonians have returned to see how things are progressing.  Some love what they have found and decided to stay, others not so much.  The truth is, many things have changed over the years, some for better and some for worse.  This is a fact of life no matter where you go, nothing is static.  I’ve been back in this country for ten years and have experienced both the good and the bad. 

The good?  We have the first modern subway system in Latin America. We are the hub for international commerce and banking which in turn has helped modernize the country with an influx of cash and jobs.  The people are wonderful; friendly and almost always willing to help a visitor who is lost.

But with the good comes the bad.  Once again, these are things that are simply unpleasant facts and come with being a modern country.  We do have crime, the traffic makes Los Angeles look like a day at the beach, and the population certainly has a rather lax attitude towards getting things done quickly.

Yet, the trade off is worth it.  Things are still affordable here, especially real estate. You can find yourself a beautiful house on the beach for less than $300,000 and utilities are about as cheap as you can find this side of the world.  But you don’t have to limit yourself to the beach.  We have mountains, cities, and suburbs with lush jungles as backyards. The former Canal Zone has plenty of townsites that are still residential and the houses are updated, with many looking like mansions straight out of Miami, only for a fraction of the price. If you are looking for natural beauty with an abundance of character, Panama is the logical destination.

What if the city might be more to your liking?  You will be more than happy to find that Panama City is the most modern in Latin America.  The aforementioned subway system is currently being expanded, with most lines ready within the next decade.  The line currently being built connects the city to two of the more popular towns in what is known as Panama Oeste, West Panama, which lies across the Canal.  With traffic being what it is, the subway system is almost like a gift from Heaven, giving residents the opportunity to reach certain destinations in minutes, as opposed to sometimes taking upwards of an hour by car. The city also features some of the best international cuisine in the region, a vibrant nightlife, and job and investment opportunities galore.

The real estate market here in the city is second to none.  Regardless of budget, there is something for everyone.  There are upscale neighborhoods and middle class ones that will not make you feel like you are settling for less.  If history is what excites you, the old section of the city known as Casco Viejo is exactly what you are looking for.  Filled with historic buildings that have been modernized and renovated without losing their charm, the area is also a hotspot of trendy restaurants, bars, clubs, and shops.  Moving into more modern territory, areas such as Costa del Este, Paitilla, and San Francisco feature modern skyscrapers and an abundance of stores and restaurants to suit your every need.

A Zonian returning home might initially be overwhelmed, perhaps even saddened by the changes they find.  This is understandable; the home they once knew has been gone for nearly five decades.  What has replaced it, however, is a panorama of investment, hard work, and a facelift that has transformed this once modest country into what can be seen as a mini global powerhouse.  This is the banking center of the world and home of the Panama Canal after all, things that have existed for decades that are just continually being updated and modernized for all to enjoy and benefit from.  A Zonian with even a modest retirement income could live rather comfortably here, complete with their pick of what type of environment they would like to live in.  They can invest and contribute to the nation’s growth and see returns on said investment that they might not dream of. 

If a Zonian is asking themselves, should I return, then the answer is a resounding and hearty YES.  The real estate market is healthy and affordable, there are investment and business opportunities around every corner and the people have somehow become even more welcoming than ever before.  As mentioned further up, we are dealing with the issues that come with being a blossoming nation but we are doing a fine job at it.  One small example is the beach in Casco Viejo.  You read that right, we have a swimmable beach right here in the city so you don’t have to travel far to enjoy a day at the beach with the family.  This beach was once the butt of jokes, polluted and undesirable.  Thanks to the hard work and efforts of the residents and businesses, this beach is now clean and a favorite destination for families and couples looking to enjoy a swim and a day of sightseeing around this beautiful historic district. 

Not everyone might find it appealing though (note from Administrator).

In conclusion, the Panama that Zonians once knew is long gone.  In its place is a modern country, built by the hard work and sweat of its people.  It is considered one of the top retirement destinations by publications around the world and the people have gone out of their way to maintain that reputation.  There is more than enough to love and appreciate that any negative feelings about the turnover are quickly washed away once a person immerses themselves in it.  Still don’t believe me?  I am one of them and I have no regrets in making the choice to return and embrace it.

SURFIN’ PANAMA

By K.C.

If everybody had an ocean
Across the U.S.A
Then everybody’d be surfin’
Like Californi-a

―The Beach Boys

In black and white striped Breton shirts, the Beach Boys sang about Surfin’ USA back in the 1960s.

Here I write about surfing in Panama. The beaches of Panama have some of the best surfable waves in the world. Surfers all around the globe fly to Panama to ride the wave here. With a coastline that spans both the Atlantic and the Pacific Oceans for 2,400 kilometers (1,500 miles), Panama has hundreds of beaches and waves to offer.

Panama will host the XVI version of the Pan American Surfing Games this year in Santa Catalina, in the province of Veraguas, from April 21 to April 30, receiving 400 athletes from 20 different countries like USA, Canada, Argentina, Dominican Republic, Venezuela, Brazil, the latter having taken home 15 medals in last year’s competition, also held in Panama but in a different beach, Playa Venao, in the Los Santos province.

An article from La Prensa, the newspaper with the largest circulation in Panama, spoke today of Argentinian surfers Lucía Indurain, 25, and Dominic Barona, 32, currently two of the best Latin American surfers, visiting Panama to develop their strategies and meet face to salty splash with the waves of Santa Catalina, which they see as very complex and tricky.

Santa Catalina is considered one of the best beaches for surfing and learning to surf, offering waves from four to 20 feet high. The month with the most ridable waves in Santa Catalina is June, with a peak of 97% and a wind speed of 8 kilometers per hour, according to a histogram from MagicSeaWeed.com. April has a rate of 93% ridable waves.

The Best season to surf in Panama is from December to April, known as the dry season.

“That’s when it happens that the big hurricane season sends massive waves to the offshore islands of Bocas del Toro,” according to PacificAdVent.com.

Quick Note: I surf as much as a giraffe with neck pain. I’m 40 years old now and bodysurfed only once more than 20 years ago, but I know one thing: I promised myself that I would always bring a 50 sunscreen whenever I went to the beach after a pretty painful sunburn. Do apply sunscreen when you sunbathe in Panama. The Panama sun is unforgiving.

Santa Catalina is a goal and a destination. It is not a secret that the beaches in this country will always make you wish to be a Baywatch lifeguard like Mitch Buchannon in a tight, red swimsuit saving blondes from drowning. Why do they always drown far away from the coast anyways? If they don’t know how to swim, how did they get so far out to sea?

In Santa Catalina you will not need to worry about David Hasselhoff or Pamela Anderson running towards you in slow motion holding a torpedo buoy.

“Santa Catalina wave offers powerful and consistent breaks, the most consistent in all of Central America,” says laSexta.com. “There the wave breaks both to the left and to the right, with power and forming good tubes.”

Whether you are a beginner surfer or a professional, Santa Catalina is a must-visit.

To Santa Catalina from the city, you can take a bus that will cost you between $13 and $16 and will have you there in 8 hours. You can also drive and that will take you around 5 hours and sap $120 from your wallet for gas for a round trip. Either way, it will be worth it.

Stay tuned for more Shaka information.

WHY YOU SHOULD BUY A BEACH HOUSE IN BUENAVENTURA NOW

By K.C.

In this article you will find the following information:

  • The Hub
  • Price Trend Statistics
  • Corredor de las Playas

THE HUB

Panama is a hub, no doubt about that: a travel hub (around 50,000 travelers go through the Panamanian International Airport, Tocumen, on a daily basis to reach their destinations ―sort of a Miami of Latin America); a financial hub (Panama has the dollar since 1904 and its financial system is solid and secure, with around 60 national and international banks); a maritime hub (the Panama Canal has been in operation since 1914 with something like 15,000 ships containing millions of different products passing through its locks every year); an import-export hub (the Colón Free Trade Zone, an autonomous entity spanning 1,064 hectares and more than 1,800 companies that operate exempt from tariffs since 1948, is the most important trade free zone in Latin America).

Martes Financiero, La Prensa financial magazine, published an article in October of 2022 stating that “Rental demand for commercial offices is growing” in Panama City, which is a sign of how healthy the Panamanian economy is. Just 30 months after lockdown and the biggest medical crisis of our time, Panama is ready to thrive once again.

Panama’s GDP is estimated to grow 4.2% in 2024, which is considerably lower than in 2023, when the GDP grew 7%, according to President Laurentino Cortizo.

This year’s slowdown is mostly due to the uncertainty dictated by a new electoral period (Panamanians will go to the polls to vote for their next President in May of 2024); the drought that prevented the optimal functioning of the Panama Canal throughout 2023; the stoppage of Minera Panamá; and national unemployment, among other global factors such as wars, the increase in the interest rates of the United States Federal Reserve (FED); and inflation.

PRICE TREND STATISTICS

The price trend statistics offered by Encuentra24.com shows a notable decrease in the price per square meter for beach house properties in the Coclé province, from $2,250 in January, 2023, to $1,456 in March, 2023, a 64.7% decrease. Today, buying a beach property in the Coclé is still a safe bet.

In a great and very interesting article from January of 2023, Forbes España writes: “Panama lives its ‘moment’: the country could forever change the Latin American real estate and hotel sector.”

Many investors from all over the world come to Panama to secure their assets by acquiring real estate because the real estate market in Panama is secure.

CORREDOR DE LAS PLAYAS

The Beach Corridor (Corredor de las Playas) will become the most expensive road that Panamanians ever paid for, according to an article from Panamá América, a Panamanian newspaper.

The Pan-American Highway is currently the quickest and cheapest way that Panamanians have to reach the beautiful beaches that their country has to offer on the Pacific side west of Panama City. Construction to expand the highway to a six-lane road in the 32.65-kilometer stretch from La Chorrera to Santa Cruz will greatly ease the flux of traffic to the beach, which is getting intense because the number of Panamanians and foreigners who decide to spend more time there is increasing exponentially.

As of January 2024, the Beach Corridor was 65% completed; it will be ready by the end of 2024, according to Panama’s ministry of public works (MOP).

FUNNY ANECDOTES #1 – ASKING FOR DIRECTIONS IN PANAMA
(AND PEOPLE WITH HATS)

By K.C.

In this article you will find the following information:

  • True Stories of a Madman
  • Why Is It Called Panama Hat?

TRUE STORIES OF A MADMAN

I remember when I was 15 in Rome riding my scooter and dodging life-threatening accidents without a helmet (yes, the 90s were crazy times). Once I was in Piazza di Spagna right next to the Barcaccia and in front of the Spanish Steps with a friend of mine from school when two tourists approached us.

“Piazza di Spagna…” the fat man said panting and making a hand gesture, “dove? Where?” This guy was as big as a refrigerator and was sweating as much as the fountain of the sunken ship by the Bernini a few centimeters from us. I will never forget his stench. The scrawny woman with brown hair who was standing by his side and who wore a Boonie Hat, presumably his wife, did not seem pleased by the Roman sun of July. I remember thinking, What is this? A safari? And also, How does she manage with this man in bed? Hey, I was 15 and curious okey?

My friend and I looked at each other then I exclaimed, “Ufff!!!”

The fat man dropped the fat hand that was holding the map in frustration.

“Really? I thought we were close,” he managed to say in broken Italian, but really, it was more Englitalian or Itanglish.

“No… no… way off…” my friend said in Itanglish. “Way off. Molto lontani da Piazza di Spagna. Look at the map. No, no, sorry.”

“So where do we go?”

And we showed them directions to the opposite side of the city center.

Life has a funny way of slapping Karma back at you. I remember when I first arrived in Panama, which couldn’t have been more than two years after the episode in Piazza di Spagna. I didn’t have a car yet and I was looking for a bar where I would meet some friends to drink a beer, or maybe two or three beers, okey make it five beers. I stopped a taxi and asked for directions.

Panamanians are very pleased when people are lost. It gives them a reason to help. Panamanians are good-hearted people always ready to help. I remember that, as I was asking for directions, an old woman walked towards us with one hand on her hip and the speed of a sloth with arthritis. I said to myself, Wherever she is going, I hope it’s not far because she might not make it.

So the taxi driver looks at me for a few seconds in silence then says: “Go straight down this road, okey?”

“Yes, yes.”

“Then take a right, okey?”

“Yea…”

“Then go straight again and take another right.”

“Ehm… okey.”

“Then straight and another right.”

I looked at the afternoon sky and turned towards my right.

“Wait, what? If I do that I’ll just make a circle and end up here.”  But when I turned back at the taxi driver, he was already gone, his cab making the rattling noise of a vehicle with an engine that is too old and is continuously struggling to stay in one piece.  

“What the hell…” I said. And I will never forget: the old lady gave me a beautiful, wrinkly smile and raised her finger, pointing at something behind me: there was the bar hidden in a corner.

Another time I was in a car, my car (it was a few years later), when a friend of mine and I went off-roading. We literally had been in the middle of the jungle and we got lost. We needed gas urgently.

“I think we are lost,” my friend said. (Keep in mind this was before GPS.)

“No, we’re not.”

“How are we not lost?”

“I’m driving. I know where we are going: we are going straight.”

“Yes, I know that, but…”

“We are not lost.”

“Do you know where you are going?”

“I know I’m going straight. How can we be lost if I know we are going straight?” I insisted.

“How does that even make any sense?”

Then we encountered a man on a horse. The horse could have been grey or dirty white and looked like Rocinante’s even more anorexic cousin, while the man, probably on his sixties, wore a Panamanian hat (not a Panama Hat, but a Panamanian hat. See images for clarification).

People from the interior are even nicer than people from the city. This guy had a smile on his face as if he had been waiting the entire afternoon for us to stop and ask him for directions. Maybe he was just happy to talk to someone other than his horse.

“Hola!” I said.

“Ajéee!”

“Yes… we need a gas station. Where is the entrance to the main road?”

“Ajeeeeee!!!!!!”

“What the hell?” my friend exclaimed.

“Calm down. That’s how they are here. Yes, ajé… where is the main road?” I asked again politely.

“Ajeee…. Faaaaaaaaaaaaaaar… You have to go DERECHO way DERECHO.”

“What is DERECHO?” asked my friend (my friend was also an Italian about my age living in Panama). “Derecha?”

“No! DERECHO!” the man on the horse said straightening his arm towards the goddam jungle.

“See? I told you we are not lost. We just need to go straight.”

“But is it far?” my friend asked. “We have no gas.”

“Ajeeeee! Yessss!!!!!! Faaaaar!!! RECTO PARRIBA Y PABAJO”

“Oh man I think we ended up on another continent.”

“What is he saying?” my friend asked.

“We are far man… we’re not gonna make it. How far? QUÉ TAN LEJOS?” I asked the Panamanian cowboy.

“Very far, young man, very far. At least fifteen minutes, if not twenty” he said in Spanish and as seriously as a doctor who is telling his patient he has terminal testicular cancer. To tell you the truth, that was the first sentence that made sense that came out from that strange man and we didn’t like it one bit.

“What are we gonna do?” my friend asked.

“There’s only one thing to do: go straight, we keep going straight and we pray.”

We thanked John Wayne and off we went.

After two minutes we arrived at the entrance to the main road and after another two we were at the gas station. Then we realized one thing: the man on the horse was either drunk or thinking of distance and time traveled on horseback, not by car (probably both). Lesson learned: Take everything with a grain of salt when you are in the interior and in general when you come to Panama. Different people experience life differently from you.

WHY IS IT CALLED PANAMA HAT?

It was a sunny day in a small town of the Azuay province in the band of the equator and a man told another man: I found a hat with five one-dollar bills in it and I thought this other guy was going to pick it up but…

But what?

…he was too busy juggling.

And they called it Panama Hat.

No. That’s not the true story of how it went. Truth is, it’s very simple, although it does have an involuntary opportunistic story behind it.

One of the first places to start weaving these plaited hats from the leaves of the toquilla plant was in fact a small town in the Andes, most precisely in the Azuay province of Ecuador, as back as the 1600s. During the 19th and 20th century ―especially after the opening of the Panama Canal on August 15th, 1914― these straw hats woven from Ecuador were shipped first to Panama before sailing off to Asia, the rest of the Americas and Europe. And because they “commercially” originated or were transported from the Panama Canal, they internationally came to be known as Panama hats.

Its true name is: Ecuadorian hat, or Jipijapa Hat, or Toquilla Straw Hat (image above).

The typical Panamanian hat (image below), known as the Sombrero Pintao (Pintao Hat), is produced in the central provinces of Panama and especially in the Coclé province.

It is made from junco, acorn and/or pita (agave) fibers, plants that are found in abundance in a humid tropical climate. The dark bands are the product of a boiling process in which the chisná leaves and the fibers to be dyed are mixed together to acquire the dark color. The whole process is done by hand and the technique was passed down from generation to generation.

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